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the other day i was chilling with my friend and we see this hot chik so iam like check that hot babe out!! and he is like dude thats my mom!!!

''Your mum is sooo fat that if she walks in front of the televison you will miss 2 programs.''

A friend of mine was on a vacation this summer and didn't just get tipsy, but fucktard drunk. Suddenly he noticed a hot chick on the dancefloor and they started to dance etc. After a while they decided to go for a smoke and since he was so drunk his pronouncement was really crap. He also noticed that he didn't have any lighter in his pocket so he asked the chick nicely "heeeyyyy Amandaa, can I .. can I borrow you later?" and ofcourse he was supposed to say "hey Amanda, can I borrow your lighter" but since he was so drunk he couldn't really pronounce "lighter" so the words formed themselves into "later".

Later that evening he was dancing with some other chick and he was still drunk. When he was going to hug the chick goodbye he was screaming across the floor to my friends "FAN VAD HON LUKTAR SVETT!!" which basically means in swedish "god damn she smells sweat like hell!" and she was asking him "what did you just say?" or "what does that mean?" he was like "I said, you smell very sweet". You basically have to be understanding swedish in order to get this joke prolly :p

Im running around in dalaran doing nothing but my usualy buisness and there is a death knight running by.

Einfari: Hey Féarless
Féarless: Hi who are you?
Einfari: Are you truly fearless as you name states?
Féarless: What do you mean? Are you afraid or something?
Einfari: I SURE AM,BYE! (runs away)